What I achieved today

Mark_365 Today I met Mark.

I introduced myself when Mark opened the door and he summoned me inside, avoiding eye contact and turning his back on me. He headed straight for his chair in the living room that I believed he had just come from. I asked if it was OK for me to sit down, he said it was, but still did not make eye contact.

After I sat down I could feel a little tension in the air, so I introduced myself and gave Mark a little background about myself, which seemed to ease the tension as Mark slowly started chatting to me about banking and business, which led the conversation on to the current news in regards to the political European Referendum. He still avoided eye contact with me, but I could sense that he was becoming more relaxed.

I decided to let Mark run with the conversation and I am glad I did as after a little time the conversation changed to his past and his trouble with past support workers. He started to tell me about himself, his family, and how he feels sometimes towards other people in regards to his anxiety, I was exceptionally happy that Mark trusted me and felt relaxed talking to me.

The hour with Mark flew by and I ended staying a little longer as he got a little emotional and I felt it wasn’t fair on him to just get up and leave. In the last 15 minutes of our conversation he started making eye contact with me, which absolutely made my day, as knowing how he was when he first let me in; to that point where I felt I was gaining his trust was truly remarkable

It is moments like these that I envisaged would take a long time for me to experience. I consider myself a very lucky person today.

Thanks a million for giving me this opportunity

Darren Bowen
Relief Support Worker
Southampton Outreach


  • Tess Marshall says:

    Reading about this experience really made me smile, Darren, how fantastic that you gained Mark’s trust so quickly. Wonderful outcome.

    • Darren Bowen says:

      Thanks for your kind comment Tess. I am new to Macintyre (just started this year) and I am just finding my feet. Since I wrote this I have had numerous of similar experiences, where I have felt so lucky to be in the position I am.

      Even as recent as this morning. I supported a man with LD’s,he finds it hard to convey emotion however, today he turned at me and said “Thanks for today I have had a really good day today” and then carried on as normal. I felt so chuffed and choked up at the same time, he has never said this before so I am on cloud 9 at present. Everyday just gets better in my opinion.

  • Emma Killick says:

    Hi Darren thank you for sharing this story about meeting Mark and also your reply to Tess.
    It’s brilliant that you are not only getting this feedback from the people you are supporting but that you are recognising the value of that. Whatever you are doing it’s clearly working for people so keep up the good work!

  • Barrie Ellis says:

    Great to hear of new staff joining and getting to grips with things in such a positive way. I am sure that with such a positive approach you will continue to have such good experiences.

  • Andrea Parr says:

    Darrren, thanks for sharing this special moment with everyone. Your approach must have been ‘just right’ to enable Mark to share so much information with you and to build up trust for the start of a great relationship. It made me smile 🙂

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